Ephesians 4:29 (ESV) instructs, “Let no corrupt talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” Think about it. Who is listening when you speak? Sure, maybe you are talking to someone else, but who else is within hearing distance? Ok, yeah – maybe it’s the person in the room with you all or those in earshot. But who else? You. Yep. You have to listen to yourself. Meaning any words you say are going to go right back into your head!
So when you are speaking, you have the power to not only speak with grace to someone else but to yourself. Speaking with grace means speaking in a manner that is courteous, kind, and pleasant. It’s characterized by warmth, empathy, and tact. When you are talking to someone, is it enjoyable to hear? Does it build them up? Are you proud that it came out of your mouth, or do you wish you had stayed silent?
I enjoy studying the Bible in various translations. Sometimes it brings things to light that you wouldn’t have otherwise thought about. The Message translates Ephesians 4:29 as “Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps; each word is a gift.” I love that. Words are gifts. How much care do you put into finding just the right gift for your friends, family, or significant other? Do you take a lot of care picking it out? My favorite part of gifting is always the wrapping. I love taking my time to wrap them beautifully and trying to make the ribbon bows look perfect. What if we thought of our words as gifts? Would we spend more time choosing just the right ones or take extra time putting on ribbons?
It also says that we are to speak words that are good for building up. Imagine that each word you say is a stone; that when you talk, you are building something. In the Old Testament, stones were used to create altars for worship or a high place. High places were left as markers of what had taken place there. They became reminders for future generations and impacted the belief systems within the culture. This is why God instructed Israel to tear down all the high places that were in the Promised Land when they arrived. They were to construct high places that would remind the inhabitants of God and direct them to Him. So if our words are stones, what are we building? Are your words building an altar to worship and direct others towards God, or are they creating a high place that will become a stronghold for someone else, prohibiting them from walking freely with Christ?
If you look back at the verse, you will notice that it also talks about not letting anything foul or corrupt come out of your mouth. So let’s talk about what is foul or corrupt. Merriam Webster’s dictionary defines foul as being offensive, notably unpleasant or distressing, obscene, abusive, treacherous, or dishonorable. Corrupt is described as being morally degenerate and perverted, putrid, or tainted.
My immediate thought when I read this verse is that we are not to swear—no curse words, which can be challenging. I work in corporate settings, and I’ll be honest, it’s everyday speech there. But the more I thought about foul language, the more I realized that it’s not just swear words God is talking about. He’s also talking about crude jokes, sarcasm that cuts, or a tone that tears others down.
Have you ever sat with someone who makes crude jokes or has bad manners? I have. I have to be honest, it’s hard for me not to get up and walk out of the room. As a believer, I have to tell you that it’s not the way we should want to be known. It will not bring the attention you think you want, and it’s unattractive.
As believers, we are called to be set apart. Holy. How is speaking with foul language holy? Luke 6:45 says, “Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.” When I speak, am I paying enough attention to what my words are saying? Do they bring grace to the hearers? What are they saying about the condition of my heart? If your words were stones, would you be building an altar of worship or a stronghold?
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Whispers of Christ 